Stroll Down Memory Lane: Jurassic Park III

The scene above comes towards the very end of the film and it is the only time the characters are not threatened by a carnivorous dinosaur. It only lasts for literally 30 seconds to a minute and then we go right back into chaos and confusion. Does anyone but me and my best friend realize that no one learns from the previous movies, which are supposed to be common knowledge events in this universe? Let me refresh your memory of this installment of “The Dinosaurs Eat All the People.”

Jurassic Park III follows Alan Grant, a now struggling (I feel like he’s always on some level of struggle) paleontologist who won’t talk about the events of the now debunk “Jurassic Park” from the first movie who is enticed by Paul Kirby, who you know as the dad from Shameless, to venture to Isla Sorna–site B of Isla Nublar WHERE THEY MADE THE DINOSAURS! Little did Grant know, Kirby and his ex-wife are looking for their lost son, Erik. And, you guessed it, they find out people were playing around with the dinosaurs again.

I would like to ask the writers and the director why this third installment felt longer than the first movie when this film is 30 minutes less than the first. You all know I love to say when a movie is too long and what needed to be cut, but this felt like a 2 to 3 hour movie and if we cut anything, the movie would just be 50 minutes. Also, because I hadn’t seen this film in years, I didn’t understand that much of what we saw in this film was probably the basis for Jurassic World–more so than the others. I was able to connect the dots and had a lot of “ohhh” moments during my watch.

What I learned from this film is that money still rules and people do not learn from their mistakes. The fascination with bringing dinosaurs back so they can roam amongst humans will never make sense to me–especially since they’ve basically established that velociraptors are smarter than fifth graders and most other humans. They’re not even making mistakes, they’re just expounding on the same one and still yelling an rustling through the jungle.

I HAVE to end this post with the funniest scene in this movie that shouldn’t have ben as funny as I and my friend made it. The scene is where the Spinosaurus is attacking their boat and Grant grabs Kirby’s phone, the one they found in hot dino poop, to call Ellie. Now, when I watched this scene, I wondered why he would call Ellie until I realized she could call someone who could go to the island and get them. Anyway, Ellie’s son Charlie answers the phone and what happens in the next three minutes or so is SO ENTERTAINING!

Imagine how relatable this is to kids from this era who are now around my age now? How many lives did Barney almost ruin because the kid got distracted for a time? Eventually, as you see, he got the phone to his mom and I applaud the fact that he didn’t open the locked front door. I do wonder if he planned on going around to the back in order to get the phone to his mom or was he going back in the kitchen to hang the phone up. The world will never know!

If you want to relive this magic that received a smooth mid 40% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, catch Jurassic Park III on Peacock, Hulu and Amazon Prime!

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